Bomoh Defeats Pontianak

Berita Harian has reported that a bomoh (traditional healer) in Batu Pahat claimed to have captured a pontianak (female vampire) that had been harassing a family in Kampung Parit Jalil, Parit Sulong for more than two weeks.

The bomoh, Mohd Razali Palil, 46, claimed that he managed to “defeat” the vampire two days ago. He released it after warning it never to bother the family again.

He added the vampire had been harassing the family from morning till night every day, and regularly revealed itself to the family members.

“I told it to return to its owner after I managed to subdue it by reading some scriptures said the bomoh.

“Such beings usually have an owner who is up to no good,” said Mohd Razali, who is better known to locals there as Wak Jah from Ladang Chaah, Segamat.

Malaysian University Ranked No. 1

I can imagine reading in the local newspapers - "Malaysian University ranked No. 1 in (a newly created local university / world ranking index)". Maybe this will be created in the very near future.

However, in the mean time, according to the Times Higher Education Supplement (THES)-Quacquarelli Symonds (QS) World University Rankings this year, no Malaysian universities have made it to the top 200 universities in the world. See Top Universities

UM - 246th spot this year
UM, which was ranked among the world's top 100 universities in 2004, was in 169th position in 2005 and 192nd spot in 2006.

UKM - 309 spot this year
UKM ranked 185th in 2005.

USM - 307th spot this year
USM was 8 in the 277th spot in 2006.

Read the full article in the NST here

It was usual for us to struggle to remain in the top 100. Now we are fighting to be within the top 200. Lets make things easy. Why not create our own university rankings ? That way, we can include criteria that other universities "cannot meet" (or don't bother to meet) thus come out tops - I'll leave this to your imagination...hahahaha

Well, we have already done this before. We have our own book of records - The Malaysian Book of Records and our own credit rating agency - Rating Agency Malaysia. Why not our own top university rankings ?

I propose it to be called, The Malaysian-Global University Rankings or The Malaysian Glocal University Rankings ?

I also propose that those who disgree with my suggestion be caught and forced to study (kite flying or top spinning) at a local university, for life. lol

Please post your comments. Tell me what you think ? please make it funny ;)

Run Casanova, Run

It has been reported Harian Metro that a group of Casanovas has been preying on married women for their money by enticing them with sweet words of love and affection.

As usual, when the victim fell for the Casanova, he would tell her sob stories about failing businesses, marriages etc to gain the victim's sympathy and trust.

Once the woman is caught in the Casanova's bait, he would shamelessly ask the women for financial assistance. In most instances, the Casanova would succeed.

Some victims claim that the men also used sorcery or black magic to get them to part with their money.

A victim who's called Ani, in her 30s, claimed that she was pestered by a man when she attended a course. She then found herself attracted to him and gave him money whenever they met. When her husband found out, he quickly sought the help of a bomoh who told them that she had been affected by black magic used by the Casanova.

What do you think about this ?

Teh Tarik Blues

There appears to be a trend among "mamak restaurants" to charge an additional 50 sen for a mug of teh tarik.

Whilst teh tarik in these shops are in marginally larger glasses (containing approximately 20% more tea), customers are charged RM1.50 for it.

I have noticed that the RM1 mug of teh tarik is no longer a choice - they are no longer served.

"Takda kecil punya, semua standard satu saiz", the mamak guy told me.

Previously the standard mug (medium) is RM1.20, now its RM1.50.

Can employees demand a pay hike from their bosses too ?

Comments please....

Forest Spirit Vs Bomoh

A bomoh fainted as she was possessed (possibly attacked) by a forest spirit at a forest near Taman Teja in Changlun, about 40km from Alor Star.

The bomoh, one of several whose help was sought to locate Nor Adilah Omar, who lived in the housing estate, was reported missing.

Apparently the spirit had warned the search party through the bomoh not to disturb the other spirits in the forest.

The bomoh regained consciousness just as the search party received news that Nor Adilah had been found in Gunung Keriang, some 50km away.

Read the full story in the Star

Happy Deepavali

Photographer: Debarshi Duttagupta

Wishing all my Hindu readers Happy Deepavali. To all others - have a nice holiday.

When you "taani" too much, don't drive.

Enjoy yourselves and be safe.

Get Rewarded By Being A Bad Employee

We all know that in Malaysia, just like anywhere else around the world, there are some employees who seem just useless or f*cked up, but yet they don't get fired. Some even get promoted, making it seem that being useless or f*cked up is actually being encouraged and rewarded by the company.

CareerBuilder.com gives 10 reasons why this is so:

1. The employee has a relationship with someone higher up - connections; those people with "ampu bodek" skills ("cable" or crony colloqually called in Malaysia).

2. The boss relies on the employee - he / she has some "special skills" or resource (whether work related or not) that the boss likes.

3. The employee brings more value to the company than he or she costs - again, he / she has some "special skills" or resource (whether work related or not) that is beneficial to the company.

4. The boss thinks it could be worse - the boss thinks that better the bad employee than nothing. This usually happen in my experience when the boss is not willing to pay market rate for top employees.

5. The boss is afraid of the employee - the employee might know some of the boss' or company's "secrets" thus can blackmail them, the employee is a thug and the boss is afraid of violent consequences etc

6. The boss feels sorry for the employee - the employee might be to sole bread winner of his family, he or his family members have health problems etc

7. The boss doesn't want to go through the hiring process - the boss is too busy or lazy to look for another employee. In some cases the boss himself have some personality defects that only this employee can tolerate. (this is related to number 4 above)

8. The employee knows something - the employee might have some connections with major customers, or have intimate information about an ongoing business of the company etc (this is related to number 1 and 4 above)

9. The employee has everybody fooled - the employee is good at playing "office politics" and is skillful at manipulating people and the work environment for his own benefit. He knows how to "play tai chi" or "main wayang kulit" (colloqually called in Malaysia).

10. He or she is not really a bad employee - the employee is only perceived as a bad employee. He / she is not a genius but is average and do perform tasks allocated to him /her.

Read the full article here.

I think whatever it is, you need some kind of advantage ("kelebihan") that the boss or the company has no choice but to keep you on the pay roll or even be forced to promote you.

The best "kelebihan" I can think of are having good connections, proficiency at office politics, being tolerant to an idiotic boss and being the cheapest (salary) in the job market (cheapskate bosses like this).

Please post your comments, what do you think ?